Research | Writing | Illustration | Mockup Design | HTML
Reclaiming Your Space: A Safety Guide for Victims of Stalking is an illustrated article about stalking and personal safety. This was largely a solo project; I poured my heart into it, since it's a very personal and important topic to me. This was also my first time directly coding a large part of the html webpage (with much help and guidance from a web designer). I can't wait to learn more about html and be more involved in the design and development aspect of building out these content pieces.
I started off by researching both legal and practical information about stalking—looking up statistics, reading personal stories, aggregating safety tips. I then wrote, rewrote, and repeatedly edited the copy for the resource, resulting in a 1500+ word piece. Because the format of the article is so conversational, I didn't want too many illustrations to clutter up the words. The tone of the article is rather gentle, so I went with a largely pastel color pallette. Once I had all of the illustrations and copy approved, I put it all into a mock up with an editorial feel in mind.
You can take a look at the final product here.
Reclaiming Your Space:
A Safety Guide for Victims of Stalking
A Safety Guide for Victims of Stalking
Am I being stalked?
Stalking is a criminal behavior that involves willful and repetitive unwanted contact, following, and/or harassment.
Virtually anyone can be a stalker, just as anyone can be stalked. However, most stalkers (75-80%) are men. They are most commonly ex-intimate partners, but they can also be sexual predators or rejected dates seeking “intimacy”.
Stalking is manifested in many different ways; it really does look different for everyone. Any repetitive behavior that makes you fear for your safety or feel harassed can be considered stalking.
These are some common stalking behaviors that should set off red flags:
• Calling or messaging you repeatedly, even when you have asked them to stop.
• Following you on your way to work, school, home, etc.
• Showing up at places you frequent—repeatedly and purposefully.
• Entering your home uninvited.
• Sending “gifts” or leaving other forms of evidence that they have been at your home.
• Looking up your personal information and details through public records, online searches, contacting your friends and family, going through your trash, or hiring a private investigator.
• Posting information about you or spreading rumors about you publicly.
• Damaging your car, home, or property.
• Threatening to damage your property.
• Threatening to hurt you or people you know (either directly or indirectly).
Sound familiar?
You are not alone.
• 1 in 6 women and 1 in 19 men have been stalked in their lifetime.
• An estimated 1,006,970 women and 370,990 men are stalked annually.
• Adults between 18 and 29 years old are the primary targets of stalking, comprising 52 percent of all victims.
• The average stalking case lasts about 2 years.
This is not your fault.
You are not responsible for someone else’s emotions and certainly not for their illegal actions. It’s not fair that the burden of deterring a stalker so often rests with the victim.
What can I do?
Unfortunately, there isn’t a one-size-fits-all solution. However, there are steps you can take to protect yourself and discourage the stalker.
Do not engage. Put your safety first. Collect evidence. Talk about it.
Do not engage with them.
Tell your stalker politely and seriously once to stop contacting you, following you, et cetera.
Once you have made your disinterest clear, stop engaging with them. Do not talk to them, don’t try to convince them, don’t yell at them, don’t send your friends to yell at them. Stalkers consider any interaction with you a victory, so any reaction (no matter how negative) reinforces their behavior. Sometimes, they even seek negative reactions, because (to them) that means their fear and intimidation tactics are working.
[Click on any of the tips below for instructions]
Block their phone number
Blacklist their email
Block them on Facebook
Set your Facebook to private
Block them on Twitter
Set your Twitter to protected
Block them on Tumblr
Password protect your Tumblr
Set your Instagram to Private
Block them on Instagram
Put your safety and space first.
No matter what, your safety comes first. In dangerous situations, you need to do whatever you can to survive; don’t worry about rules, manners, or collecting evidence.
There is a strong link between stalking and other forms of violence in intimate relationships: 81 percent of women who were stalked by a current or former husband or cohabiting partner were also physically assaulted by that partner and 31 percent were also sexually assaulted by that partner.
Protecting yourself, your family, and your space comes first.
Safety looks different for everyone, but here are some general pieces of advice for increasing your personal safety.
Carry a cell phone with you at all times
so that you can call for help if you are feeling uneasy or threatened.
If you have a smartphone, consider using a personal safety app like bSafe you (http://getbsafe.com/) or Circle of 6 (http://www.circleof6app.com/)
Always lock your doors
whether you’re at home or going out.
Improve your home security.
Consider installing and consistently arming a home security system.
Stalkers who are ex-intimate partners often have familiarity with your home, so you need to be extra careful around your most vulnerable entry points (since they probably know about them, too).
Consider installing a monitored home security system with duress codes, which allow you to discreetly call for help in cases of emergency.
Video security cameras will catch any intruders, providing evidence supporting your claims against the stalker if you decide to go to the police and/or court.
Change your passwords,
especially if the stalker is an ex-intimate partner who knows enough about you to guess or remember your passwords. They may be using your online accounts to track your whereabouts and other personal information (like spending habits, if they have access to your bank accounts).
Have a safety plan.
Consider the worst case scenarios. Think about all the pathways to exit your home, your workplace, and any other place you frequent. Know where the nearest police station is. Have a mental list of important members of your support system that you can call when you need help or protection, and keep them in your speed dial or contact favorites.
Apply for a restraining order
if you are feeling repetitively physically threatened. The process and requirements for obtaining a restraining order are different in each locality.
Change your phone number
if blocking them doesn’t work and the incessant phone calls and messages are disrupting your ability to focus on your day-to-day.
Consider moving
in extreme cases of stalking where the stalker is posing a serious threat to your (or your family’s) safety, and nothing else seems to work.
Collect evidence; it adds up.
Keep records of all written messages that they send to you. Write down all the times that they try to call you. Record all of their visits to your home, gym, or office. Collect all of the “gifts” they send you and/or all the notes they leave. Take pictures of any damage that they do to your property. Write down what your friends and family tell you about the stalker’s attempts to contact them.
In the moment, one sticky note left on your door may not seem like much. Just another phone call may seem petty to complain about or write down. Victims commonly find themselves thinking “if they do it again, then I’ll take it seriously.”
Stalking is a serious crime. Your safety is important, and you deserve not to be harassed and intimidated by another person who is following you, threatening you, and disrespecting your space and person. Take every threat, every message, every unwanted gift seriously. You will be surprised how it adds up, taxing you both physically and emotionally.
Collecting a record of all of the stalker’s contact attempts as well as the physical evidence they have left behind will not only help you build a case against them legally but also help you validate (to yourself and others) that this is a real problem that you are facing.
Talk about it.
It is understandable to feel like this is a secret you need to keep on your own. Women are pressured to seem pleasing and appeasing to everyone. Men are pressured to appear “in control,” especially of women in their lives. Everyone is taught to shy away from asking for help, and our culture often misplaces blame on the victims of stalking, sexual violence, and domestic violence.
Stalking is illegal. You are not responsible for protecting this “secret,” and you are definitely not responsible for protecting your stalker. You deserve peace and safety.
Break the silence, and you may find that more people will relate to you than judge you.
You need support now more than ever, and you don’t have to go through this alone. Tell your friends what is happening. Tell your family.
Furthermore, tell your neighbors, so that they can alert you or the authorities if they see anything suspicious going on around your home while you are away (or even when you are in).
Talk to law enforcement. The conversation you have with your local police department doesn’t have to be a one-time, all-or-nothing report. It’s okay to alert them of the situation, even if they can’t do anything now. Keep calling them anytime something happens. This builds a record with them, so that your experience is officially written down with a law enforcement agency. And, in the worst case scenario, if the stalker ever does hurt you or your family, they will already know exactly who they are.
You Deserve to Feel Better.
Literally millions are stalked every year, yet there is still so much stigma, silence, and shame around this subject. It’s time we speak up. Together, we can all break the silence on this unacceptable, illegal, and far-too-widespread behavior.
You never know who you might help.
Sources:
1 https://sapac.umich.edu/article/65
2 http://legaldictionary.net/stalking/
3 http://www.nij.gov/topics/crime/stalking/pages/welcome.aspx
4 https://www.ncjrs.gov/pdffiles/169592.pdf
5 http://ccwrc.org/about-abuse/about-stalking/
6 https://www.ncjrs.gov/pdffiles/169592.pdf
